The Clarkey Zone . . .

GOD  If God does exist, he'll be laughing hysterically at all the guff talked about him down here. Either that, or be so embarrassed that he'll have buggered off somewhere under an assumed identity... ¥ (the creator formerly known as God)... hoping that no-one holds him personally responsible. My belief is that we're just bloody lucky to be here, so enjoy it while you can. If, when you die, you find yourself being denied entry at those Pearly Gates, tell 'em your girlfriend's inside, or it's your birthday, or summat. The more likely scenario, however, is that you'll be engulfed in an infinite black void... in which case, do nothing.

BRAIN-WASHED  From the moment of birth, we are subjected to a continual barrage of brain-washing. A form of social conditioning designed to make us 'productive' members of society. Those that perpetuate brain-washing (the Brain-Washers) are unware of their role, because they too have been brain-washed. Of course, I could be saying all this as a result of my own brain-washing, but then at least I'd be right about my Brain-Washing Theory. If you suspect that this is a complex double-bluff to divert your attention away from the truth about brain-washing, then by all means disregard it.

How do I de-programme myself?

Question your thoughts. Question your actions. Trust your instincts (the only thing intact after prolonged brain-washing).

Is being brain-washed a bad thing?

Not necessarily. Some people seem to do quite well on it. Hey... if you're happy, ignore all this. Just because you're a brain-washed zombie, whose life isn't your own, this doesn't make you a bad person.

What are the results of successful de-programming?

Your day-dreams will develop into mild acid trips (not that I've taken the stuff... just going from what I've heard). You'll find it increasingly difficult to associate with others (unless they've also been de-programmed). Your creativity will hit hitherto unreached heights.

Isn't this just another one of those conspiracy theories?!

Probably. :o)